Well….12 of the Top 20 are on the Road this week which is usually a good recipe for some upsets and near misses! Great week to see some “home-dogs” take home a W or at least some Vegas $$$.
A look at the McRib “for a limited time only” Poll of those who knew in their heart, if they are honest, they just needed to enjoy their short time in the Top 25. Texas A & M, Virginia, Memphis, and Wake Forest can now go back to just finishing the season and making some mid to late December bowl games. They likely have more company next week.
1 bright spot with Appalachian State in the Top 25 for only the 2nd time in school history and the #24 slot is the highest in school and SunBelt Conference History. ZT has a soft spot for them since they popped Michigan in 2007 and Mack “I just want to have fun coaching this time” Brown at UNC this year. Hat’s off to Appy State but I do have to say their Mascot, Yosef the Mountaineer, looks like he should either be in the old Clint Eastwood movie The Outlaw Josey Wales or locked up for doing bad things to goats.
Padre is “on assignment” and word is he is helping raid a Ouija Board convention in SC. Hope he gets it handled before evil is transmitted through him to his Gators!!
ZT has been on the road and had an odd bit of food in Kansas. Still trying to understand why one would put parmesan cheese on the outside of a quesadilla filled with standard Mexican fare. That said, ate it and paid for it later in an airplane lav but ready to roll with some not so cheesy prognostications.
Friday Night Appetizer
#4 Ohio State Buckeyes 41 Northwestern Wildcats 9
ZT was NOT happy that the Buckeyes are playing on High School Night….YOU ARE TOO GOOD FOR THIS!!!!……then noted coming off a Bye week with Wiscy next week makes this a BRILLIANT move for the #1 team in the ZT Winners Poll! Now the question to be answered: Who is going to step up and challenge THE Ohio State University this year? We won’t get the answer from 1-4 Northwestern this week……Sorry citizens of Evanston, when the lead article about your team is titled “How an offense 20 years ago influenced Urban Meyer and Ryan Day” it sounds like a 150 lb. no-name wrestler asking Hulk Hogan not to pile drive him. LIGHTS OUT Wildcats!!
Saturday Full Portion Prognostications
#12 Oregon Ducks 24 #25 Washington Huskies 20
ZT liking the Ducks in general…….stayed resilient after a heartbreaking loss to Auburn in the opener and then stringing 5 straight wins together including CAL and a road win over the Trees at Stanford. By the Transitive Theory since Stanford beat Washington on the road and Ducks beat Stanford………yep, doesn’t apply to football. Oregon does have their ducks in a row on defense as they have held 3 conference opponents to less than 10 points and been tough in the Red Zone. Huskies could win the Punk-12 North if they run the table but MUST have more consistent play from QB Jacob Eason. RB Ahmed and WR Fuller are solid but need others to step up if UW is to win. Defense must also create some turnovers. Ducks have won last 5 meetings when both teams are ranked and this looks to be the toughest game left on their schedule……Its ok Huskies, McRibs are good and you will enjoy being added to the list next week. It should be close so ZT will throw in some fries and an apple pie ( sorry, the apple ain’t from Washington and not 100% sure its actually an apple!).
#17 Arizona State Sun Devils 24 #13 Utah Utes 31
ZT can’t seem to figure out Utah…..must be from being raised Catholic ( don’t get any ideas ND fans as I just know your secrets a little better ) and now Methodist ( must be a connection with ZT’s love of potluck meals ). Utes are 5-1 with only a dumpster fire at USC preventing them from still being drooled on by Lee Corso ( think he now drools regardless ). Utah has an average margin of victory of 27 in their 5 wins and is Top 25 nationally on both sides of the ball. One area of weakness is special teams and that can haunt you in a big game ( Hey Nick, you want to give me an AMEN on that one? ). For the Sun Devils, a loss to the lowly CU buffalos is the only blemish on their record and they have taken out Michigan State and CAL on the road! Freshmen QB Jayden Daniels was highly recruited by Utah ( said he thought having 4 girlfriends and playing QB was just too much ) and has been an excellent dual-threat leader. Do like Herm Edwards and he seems to always be in close games with AZ State noting 13 of his 19 games being decided by a TD or less! Expect the Indigenous team from Utah to win a close one.
#16 Michigan Wolverines 17 #7 Penn State Nittany Lions 24
Big Game in the Big 10!! Wolverines lost handily to Wiscy and had struggle wins against Army & Iowa while the Nittany Lions are undefeated but had tough games with Pitt & Iowa. Last time at Happy Valley was a big PSU victory with 110,000+ in a Whiteout Night Game and they hope to repeat that this year! UM did a nice reversal last year in Ann Arbor but we are back to Happy Valley. Michigan is playing better defense but need an error-free performance on Offense to dig out a win. ZT has a feeling Harbaugh and his Wolverines will keep this close in a slug fest but Penn State gets a win at home.
ZT Quick Snack Picks
#11 Auburn Tigers 49 Arkansas Razorbacks 14
Gus Bus got an overhaul during the Bye Week after hitting a large gator on I-75. Perfect test track for the repairs is a pig trail in Arkansas.
#6 Wisconsin Badgers 49 Illinois Fighting Illini 12
A Badger’s diet is heavy on earthworms ( 1 reason the University of California – Santa Cruz Banana Slugs won’t play them ) but they will eat anything and are particularly fond of sweet corn. Not good for the Midwest children of the corn. Only thing Wiscy needs to do is forget they play Ohio State next week and they will crush the Illini. Students almost voted to replace retired mascot Chief Illiniwek with “Alma Otter”….. A Badger will eat that too!!!
Tennessee Volunteers 13 #1 BAMA 42
Vols HC Jeremy Pruitt stated ” We may not punt and only on-side kick all game” as a strategy ( His IQ drops every time he opens his mouth )………Biggest issue with that strategy is you may only get to kickoff once……Vols were counting on bad weather to help and even that has appeared to not be going their way. Only person in Tuscaloosa that likes Tennessee is a guy that sells a floating picture of Phil Fulmer that fits nicely in a commode!
#3 Clemson Tigers 38 Louisville Cardinals 10
Cardinals have quietly recovered to a 4-2 record after a rough start. Don’t think it will be enough as Clemson is having a harder time finding it’s mojo than Austin Powers. Tigers HC Dabo Sweeney got mad when asked about what was wrong with QB Trevor Lawrence. He said “Why you want to start drama? There ain’t no drama on this team!!!” He then said ” If we don’t find Trevor some AXE body spray and some of that hair stuff he uses, he is going to pitch a fit and won’t audible for a whole quarter!!”
#9 Florida Gators 27 South Carolina Gamecocks 20
Wounded Gator vs. Cocky Bird……… I will take a Gator over any fowl and will this week as well. Believe HC Mullen will have UF ready and convinced Hulk Muschamp will power down this week in Columbia.
#2 LSU Tigahs 38 Mississippi State Bulldogs 10
Coach O asked for film to see what he could learn from the MSU loss to Tennessee. Said later that “those bands put on a hell of a show at the half” After the game, Gary Danielson is talking to a lady from Detroit about interesting things she has seen since she moved to Mississippi. She noted she saw a beaver dam for the first time on someone’s farm. She noted “Those beavers get pretty nasty building that Dam.” Trying to impress her, Gary states ” You know a clean beaver can handle more wood than a dirty one.” He hopes the handprint will be gone from his face by Tuesday.
Temple Owls 31 #19 SMU Mustangs 38
Mustangs feeling good and even the Alumni starting to break out their Pony Express shirts and pictures of their Pontiac Trans Am’s with the T-tops to re-live their glory days….HC Sonny “I like Women’s Spikes” Dykes is a master at working the transfer portal with 35 “imports” on the squad. Former TX QB Buechele is a tough guy noting he was born AFTER his father had a vasectomy……ZT thinks he should be an Olympic Swimmer instead…… Temple (5-1) sent Memphis to the ZT McRib list and wants to do the same to SMU. Look for the Mustang Air Raid Offense to take out the Owls in a close one.
#18 Baylor Bears 31 Oklahoma State Cowboys 35 Somewhat of An Upset
Why are the undefeated Bears an underdog to the HC Mike “I’m a man, come after me!” Gundy?? In the words of Ole Miss Student-Elected Mascot Admiral Ackbar “IT’S A Trap!!”” ( just like when your wife says “Do I look fat in this dress?” ). Gundy’s Cowpokes are solid in creating explosive plays but also are higher in the INT department. They will use RB Chuba “wamba” Hubbard ( who gets knocked down but gets up again ) to pound the Bears defense who just lost starting LB Johnston to a torn ACL……Look for the Cowboys to lasso the Bears in a close one….
Colorado Buffaloes 24 Washington State Cougars 45
How are a bunch of “fat, lazy, entitled” WSU players going to break out of a 3-game slide that resembles rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic? PLAY COLORADO!!!! Well, Pirate Mike has banned all social media for his players for the rest of the season. Understand he had a hacker from Belarus build a virus that sends a photo of “that picture” ( see below ) automatically to the player’s phone if they attempt to log on or talk to “their fat little girlfriends” ( YouTube from 2009 ). SO…..if you don’t watch the game, at least check out the post game presser as it WILL NOT be available on-line..
ZT Burnt Entrée……..
East Carolina Pirates vs. UCF
A few games actually with larger spreads ( including Bama, Oklahoma with Former Bama QB Jalen Hurts, and Wisconsin ) but the key is NOBODY CARES ABOUT UCF ANYMORE!!!!! It was fun to watch the posers of UCF lose on the road to Pitt and then again in Cincinnati after the Bearcats taunted them before and after the game but what’s left now? NOTHING BECAUSE NO ONE CARES ANYMORE!!!! Ok, East Carolina is a nice place and know a guy that went there but that’s it. So, recommend instead of watching this one you get your eyebrows plucked, watch a YouTube about knitting, go to Hobby Lobby and buy a Jack ‘O Lantern Kit to make one that looks like Ruth Bader Ginsburg, and then tell your wife/girlfriend you would just love to snuggle on the couch and watch one of those Lifetime Channel Movies with her or maybe just read some poetry……
ZT is out for some heavy travel over the next week so get ready Truckstops as I love a place where you can fuel, eat, shop, and shower in the same place. Love those machines where the hot dogs and sausages roll all day like a lumberjack on a log in Oregon…..
Padre completed the Ouija Board intervention…..such a good job that he even got 5 FSU fans to spell “SPURRIER YES!” on the board. That said, rumor has it he asked how many prognostications to make and it went to the number 6…evil number 6 but here we go….
Auburn Tigers 44 Arkansas Razorbacks 13
It is desperate times for the angry pigs. Mike Leach could be there right now, and at least ( win or lose ) Arkansas pressers would be the most entertaining part of the SEC Media side. Much more entertaining than Saban’s rants next to his 20oz. bottle of Coke.
Florida Gators 20 South Carolina Gamecocks 17
As ALWAYS, I’m really worried we lose. Plus, it’s supposed to rain, with wind, all game long. That’s a bad set up for Florida on the road as a heavy pass team. BUT I’m going with my Gators. Gonna trust Mullen can get it done over Boom. Nothing funny to say here. More nervous than the LSU game…
Oregon Ducks 30 Washington Huskies 27
Almost went with very minor upset here, but last week I said Colorado would beat Oregon. And they almost did! It was a close 45-3 game. Just a few bad breaks…… Anyway, I won’t pick against Oregon again in the Pac-12. Huskies turn it over late in a drive to tie or win. The Ducks win and somewhere….Emilio Estevez is smiling!
Alabama ” Michael Myers” Tennessee “Random Teenager from Movie Nobody Remembers”
Silent but very violent and gruesome bludgeoning in Tuscaloosa..
Michigan Wolverines 24 Penn State Nittany Lions 23
Somehow, someway, Captain Khaki ruins Penn State’s Whiteout. And all over America, Ohio State fans are ……..actually happy. Harbaugh saves himself, AGAIN. Best news for Buckeye Nation EVER!!!!
Arizona State Sun Devils 27 Utah Utes 23
SO, this is not based off fact. It’s only based off the emotion I have for Herm!!! GO HERM!!! Play to win the game!!!!!
Padre asked one final question on the OUIJA Board ( without his Bishop knowing he is using it )…….. ” Is Casper truly a friendly ghost or just like “friendly” to your face, but talks trash about you behind your back?…. answer next week…….
Pigskin Prognostications by the Piedmont Padre and Zimmern's Twin 