ZT will not go to a massive gathering and community buffet for Thanksgiving but you can bet he will absolutely eat 4 times his normal caloric intake and will watch 5 times his normal “allocation” of football!! Padre is preparing to broker a peace deal in the middle east….in today’s world that is between North Carolina and Virginia! ZT up first since he has 6 pies in the oven…….
#6 Florida Gators vs. Vanderbilt Commodores
Bottom Line…. UF HC Mullen knows the Gators need all the “Style Points” they can muster to make the big party AND help QB Kyle Trask win a Heisman. Best prediction for this one comes from Clubber Lang in the 1982 Rocky 3 film when asked for his prediction of the upcoming fight with Balboa…..
Gators 55 Commodores 20
#4 Clemson Tigers vs. Florida State Seminoles
T. Lawrence is BACK!!!! Clemson 104 FSU 24.. this is the combined 2018-19 score between these 2. FSU Defense, particularly the pass rush, has been as absent as a Republican absentee ballot in Michigan…….and that isn’t the biggest issue as Seminoles may be down to their last scholarship QB with Tate “Date Bait” Rodemaker ( this is when your grandparents call ahead of the game and say ” just wanted you to know we love you! ). Good news is game is played in Tallahassee so a much shorter trip to receive medical care. FSU one of the few programs actually WORSE than 2020 in general. ZT sees the ‘Noles, in pregame, saying “This is OUR Bowl Game!” Clemson is ready to Blow Someone OUT after the ND loss and nothing says Happy Thanksgiving more than sticking it to a team named after Native Americans……. Tigers 56 Seminoles 17
**** SAT AM UPDATE….GAME CANCELLED AFTER FSU followed COACH O and LSU’s body of work from last week and spoke with some Democratic operatives in Wisconsin that gave the ‘Noles a path out!!*********
#9 Indiana Hoosiers vs #3 THE Ohio State University Buckeyes
1990…..Edward Scissorhands was a top movie, and Ice, Ice Baby by Vanilla Ice was a one hit wonder song. So, why is ZT not surprise IU & OSU tied 27-27 ( not sure why ZT posted the 2nd “27” after stating they tied!?? ). Since that time, no sequels and no wins by the Hoosiers in this series. That said, don’t think Buckeyes are already notching this win at home. ZT LOVES the Hoosiers as another Chinese Year of the Covid success story. Even the Farmer’s Almanac did not indicate IU would be in the Top 10 in November! IU QB Michael Penix, Jr. vs. OSU QB Justin Fields will be fun to watch. Hoosier D is solid as well, particularly against the run. OSU RB (and amateur rapper?) Master Teague along with Trey “preach a” Sermon are a 1-2 punch most teams don’t recover from. Indiana ( note the name means “land of the Indian” although less than 10,000 still live there and ZT gets that for sure having visited! ) starts off fast but OSU pulls away late. Buckeyes 34 Hoosiers 21
Appalachian State Mountaineers vs #15 Coastal Carolina Chanticleers
ZT ready to call the end of this TEAL strain of the Bird Flu……then, a setback as Mountaineer QB Zac Thomas ( no relation to ZT even though same initials ) took a 4th quarter hit out of bounds last week and after a hospital stay, its uncertain if he plays this week. Backup QB is Jacob Huesman ( unfortunately NOT Heisman ) will have tough duty playing The Chants. The Teal is balanced on both sides of the ball and playing at home as well. NC Mountain based vaccine not ready yet and the Chants continue to infect the Top 25 for another week. CCC Teal Machine 28 Mountaineers 27
Kentucky Wildcats vs. #1 Bama
Bama had some extra time off (after LSU was successful in catching the ‘rona to avoid the impending devastation along with a bye week) but they are accustomed to this extra time from their annual participation in post season activities. The Blue Man group from Lexington had a tough fight with Vandy last week. Hmm…looking ahead?? Well, what’s the exact opposite of playing the Commodores at home? Playing Bama in Tuscaloosa!! Expect KY to try to control the ball with a solid run game and just enough air time from QB Terry Wilson to keep the Tide out of 8-9 man front. Bama defense is not dominate but improving. The issue is Bama will score with QB iMac Jones and RB’s Najee Harris & Brian Robinson. KY defense is solid so the Elephant herd will not just stomp through the woods like they did in the Jungle Book ( ZT with a children’s book reference? ..) ZT says closer than Vegas predicts but adding that Wildcats missing their All-American Punter and the Bama talent level rises again……. Bama 41 Blue Wildcat Group 20
Gary Danielson is on the west coast after the Texas A & M/Ole Miss game Covid-Cancelled. He was sad as he planned to announce his new dark web venture, “Cram It Gary”. From unverified reports, he will be willing to stuff ANYTHING in a turkey via live video for $25. This is only done between 11pm – 4am in the privacy of a Motel 6 room. Says he got the idea from the Cameo website where celebrities will wish you Happy Birthday, etc. for a fee. Said he was rejected from Cameo as market research said max anyone would pay to hear him say anything was 14 cents and that was from Brian Griese.
Tennessee Volunteers vs. #23 Auburn Tigers
Vols have lost 4 straight as HC Jeremy Pruitt is, well…Jeremy Pruitt. Add in a QB controversy with QB Jarrett “i bought a ferret” Guarantano possibly benched for Freshman Harrison “I kiss my mirror daily” Baily. The REAL issue is the Vols O-line. If not solid, it wouldn’t matter if Crazy Legs Hirsch had the ball! Tigers got to protect QB Bo Nix and part of this is not having him run 10+ times per game (current average) and take more hits than a bumper car at a cheap amusement park. Aubs are dealing with a high number of players out due to Covid but at this time, game is still on!! Tigers 31 Vols 27
#14 Oklahoma State Cowboys vs #18 Oklahoma Sooners
Ranked teams in the Big 12 going at it! Interesting that so many talk about Cowboys HC Mike Gundy but he has ONLY 2 wins over OU in last 14 years. That would get your a$% fired in the SEC before it got that far…….. the key motivator for BEDLAM this year? Winner has the hot track to the Big 12 Championship Game. Ok State Offense, with banged up RBs and an O-line that looks like a mix & match value menu at McDonald’s, has to keep the pressure off QB Spencer “I like girls that are left-handers” Sanders. Sooners are banged up as well with QB Rattler needing to be on his A-game as Cowboys do play solid defense. IF RB Stevenson can have another solid performance, Sooners can pull this one off. ZT going with Sooners strictly because he decided he can kick Gundy’s butt and if he can, no question the Sooners can! Sooners 34 Cowboys 27
ZT Pre-Thanksgiving Quick SNACK Picks……..
#7 Cincinnati Bearcats vs UCF Golden Knights
What a difference a year makes!! Cincy ruined UCF’s run at being 2-time Orlando/DisneyWorld Champ in 2019. Bearcats want to be 1st team NOT in Power 5 to make the playoffs. UCF would like to ruin that. UCF QB Dillon “I’m no angel” Gabriel has to have best game of year. ZT believes in angels so UPSET SPECIAL Golden Knights 30 Bearcats 27
#21 Liberty Flames vs N.C. State Wolfpack
Flames looking for another ACC win in the Year of Covid!! Love what Hugh Freeze has done for Liberty and glad he didn’t screw up Michael Oher in high school……rumor is he may be up for the S.C. job. Teams like Liberty get derailed with that kind of talk…… Wolfpack 45 Flames 28
Mississippi State Bulldogs vs #13 Georgia Bulldogs
Georgia starts USC transfer QB J.T. Daniels? Why NOT as Leach’s Pooches have done nothing of late…….ZT would start J.T.’s Grandma in this one if needed….. Blue State Bulldogs 38 Alien Bulldogs 11
#20 USC TROJANS vs Utah Utes
Trojans have played 2 games and found ways to win. Utes, which are Indians that were among the first to use horses as a means of transportation, have yet to play. Not a good set up. USC bucked the Utes in 2019 but haven’t won in Salt Lake City since 2012. Ends Saturday… Trojans 35 Indians on Horses 21
Padre taking a break from preparing a list of things to be thankful for including Uber drivers that have your taste in music, no lines at airport security, waking up before your alarm goes off, and that Michigan, LSU, and several other teams are so bad you can actually enjoy a conversation with them ( FSU still excluded!)…….so here we go…
Ohio State 51 Indiana 17
It’s the so called “Game of the Week.” and it will be the “Rout of the Week.” Indiana’s only chance is if Bobby Knight is allowed on the field and throws a chair at Justin Fields knocking him unconscious. And even then, I think Ohio State would win by 20+. ** Ps. Georgia let Justin Fields leave……
Clemson 55 FSU 10
Ha. Haha. Hahaha. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.!!!! Why couldn’t Florida play FSU again this season?!?!?
Arkansas 27 LSU 26
In a close battle, QB Franks leads the piglets down the field for a last second FG. All of the Hog fans celebrate by making a run to Wal-Mart for celebratory snacks— Not because they all love Wal-Mart, but because you can ONLY shop at Wal-Mart in NW Arkansas. Seriously, that’s all they have. I think it’s in the state constitution. Arkansans bank, get haircuts, buy tires, steaks and their Hog gear at Wal-Mart (or Sam’s Club…which is just an even bigger Wal-Mart). Save Money. Live Better – Sam Pittman. Win football games.
Alabama 43 Kentucky 13
Bear Bryant’s practice school is demolished by Bear Bryant’s REAL school.
Oklahoma 31 Okie State 24
The guy who looks like he’s trying to be the hip 2020 coach once again beats the guy who looks like he is trying to be the hip 1987 high school coach.
Michigan – “Oh My Gosh!” Rutgers – “Who the Heck Cares?”
UPSET OF THE WEEK: UCF 30 Cincy 27
UCF pulls off the upset and then claims to be the first ever (self-proclaimed) Intergalactic Football Champions!
EXTRA UPSET OF THE WEEK: UCLA 34 OREGON 30
Chip Kelly bests his old team! Of course, all of my upset picks this year seem to be MASS FAILURES….. Thanks Obama!!
TRIPLE UPSET OF THE WEEK: Northwestern 26 Wisconsin 24
With that Upset of the Week failure reality in mind, I will do what Trump does when it is CLEAR it’s over: I WILL TRIPLE DOWN BABY! I say the smart kids beat the cheese-heads!! It’s gonna be YUGE!!!! I hear lots of people saying, that it is the best upset pick ever!!!! Tremendous!!!! And if Wisconsin wins, the scorekeeper was CLEARLY in bed with the Badgers and this game was rigged!!!
ZT and The Padre wish all of you a great Thanksgiving!!!! Unless of course you are playing Bama ( Auburn ) or Florida ( Kentucky ) next week…..then we hope you get a turkey leg stuck in your throat or somewhere worse…..
Pigskin Prognostications by the Piedmont Padre and Zimmern's Twin 