More turmoil than an old episode of Jerry Springer this past week. Started Friday Night with ranked teams FSU and TCU losing on the road and then Saturday with #’s 3, 4, 5 all losing with Georgia and Penn State doing that at home. The Pope’s boys ( yes Notre Dame ) went to Fayetteville and fried the Razorbacks. That led to Sam Pittman (32-34 final ARK record ) being dropped off at the Greyhound station with a can of beanie-weenies and a 6 pack of Keystone Light.
Week 6 and who would have predicted ESPN GameDay heading to Tuscaloosa for the Vandy vs Bama as the top ranked match up of the week? Your right, only Zoltar if you have a quarter in your pocket!!
Pigskin Prognostication Update: Padre 24-14 ZT 22 – 16 ZT noted “Why be 1st when 2nd still gets all the same snacks….” Moving on!
Padre still leading off for Week 6 ( no surprise noting your competition is ZT! )
Texas @ Florida: “The Battle of Most Overhyped QBs.” — I’ve got to root for my team, right? Right?! But I also want change next season. Classic 2010 to 2025 Florida conundrum. And knowing Billy Napier, this feels like the exact moment he rips off a mini-run of surprise wins just convincing our AD, “We’re turning the corner!” Dude, we’ve been “turning the corner” for three straight years. At this point, we’re just doing donuts in an abandoned K-Mart parking lot. Still, I’ll pull for my Gators. Is that enough? Honestly…. I actually think, yeah. Injuries? Check. Dysfunction? You bet. And yet I’ve got this weird, swampy extra week of rest feeling we pull it off. Napier shocks the world! Well—the world that still cares. Which, let’s face it, excludes 99% of college football fans when you’re 1-3. Florida 20, Texas 17 (am I supposed to be happy if we win and are 2-3?!?!)
Iowa State @ Cincinnati: Full disclosure — I know very little about either of these teams. Honestly, I was surprised to see Cincinnati favored. I do like Iowa State’s head coach, though. Seems like a guy who brings a lunch pail to work and yells inspirational stuff about “grit and perseverance” to the players. But, on the other side, for some bizarre reason, I’ve always been a fan of Cincinnati’s “C” logo. It just looks…cool. At the end of the day, I’ll take a good coach over a cool logo. Give me the Cyclones in a tight one. Iowa State 26, Cincinnati 24
Vandy @ Bama: Vandy has been talking trash. Yes, you read that right — Vanderbilt is talking trash. Vanderbilt! The school best known for academics, baseball, and politely losing by 30 to 40 in football. Back in the day (let’s say, 2015), their best insult might have been: “Hey Bama! We know you’re better at football, but I bet you think the ocean touching your state is called the Gulf of America. Go to a library and learn something!” But times have changed. Vandy is actually good now. Bama no longer has Saban. And the Gulf of America? I hear it’s “Yuge. Best gulf ever!” Still, I think Bama has revenge on their minds. Vandy keeps it close early, but Bama wakes up after halftime and reminds everyone they were simply prophets about the Gulf of America. Bama 34, Vandy 16
Virginia @ Louisville: Virginia is riding high after beating Florida Satanic Univeristy… I mean, State, last week. This feels like the perfect setup for them to have a cavalier attitude toward Louisville (Dad Joke Warning). Jefferson’s university strolls into Kentucky and leaves either fried or slugged (Dad Joke Warning #2). Louisville 34, Virginia 26
Texas Tech @ Houston: Both teams are undefeated… but let’s be honest, one feels a little more “real” than the other. Unless Houston somehow cloned Oiler greats Earl Campbell and Warren Moon, this one feel one sided. Houston hangs around for a bit, but Texas Tech hits the gas and pulls away. Texas Tech 38, Houston 17
Miss St @ Texas A&M: The line is over 16, which seems high considering how well the Bulldogs have been playing. While A&M has historically been an underachiever, Mississippi State has long been the Rodney Dangerfield of the SEC — no respect. No, it’s not Vandy. We SEC folks see Vandy as the cute little puppy barking at a full-grown Doberman. The Aggies win rather comfortably at home. Texas A&M 31, Miss St 17
Miami @ FSU: Nothing would bring me more joy than watching the Criminoles drop two in a row. Sadly, I have a bad feeling they’ll come out desperate in this one. If this game were in Miami, I’d ride with the Canes — but it’s not. It’s being played in the capital city of Hades. The boys from Miami put up a fight, but the stench of sulfur proves too strong. The Noles pull off the win. FSU 27, Miami 23.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go wash my mouth out with soap. Have a great Saturday!
Now that ZT has finished the 9 Biscoff cookies he requested from the flight attendant under the guise of “my wife really likes these, can I have some extra?” ( Quit eating and start prognosticating ZT! ).
14 Iowa State Cyclones vs Cincinnati Bearcats 11am
Cyclones looking tough to beat and leading the Big 12 but Bearcats have reeled off 3 wins since an opening day loss to Nebraska. Interesting to note US has not had a Hurricane hit the mainland in 2025 and even The Weather Channel’s Jim Cantore has indicated if this keeps up he will be opening up a psychic hotline or become a sign spinner in front of a coastal seafood restaurant. This one makes one feel weirder than a bowl of Skyline chili in a storm shelter but going the home team in this one. Bearcats 27 Midwest Twisters 24
9 Texas Longhorns vs Florida Gators 230pm
This is Win or call Sam Pittman for tips on how to pack an office in 8 minutes for Billy Napier. Longhorns schedule since the opener vs. OSU looks like a cupcake display at Publix ( combined opponent record of 1-8 ). ZT has had beef for dinner every night this week and believes Gators will have some on Saturday ( even with 3 DL out…Next Man Up!!! UPSET SPECIAL Gators 24 Longhorn Steakhouse 23
16 Vandy vs 10 Bama. 230pm
ESPN Gameday knows this one is big. Commodores doing it right and 5-0. They are capable of beating Bama. Yes, ZT said it. They have the Coach, the QB and the committed team to get a road W. One problem…. BUT, Bama was able to stay ALL NIGHT in Athens without calling mom to come get them and now turn their attention to rectifying the 2024 upset in Nashville. Not going to happen in Tuscaloosa in 2025 but if you like to bet, take the ‘Dores and the points. Bama 38 Vandy 31
24 Virginia Cavaliers vs Louisville Cardinals. 230pm
ZT confident the Cavaliers student body ran a faster 40 than 83% of the horses in the Kentucky Derby when they stormed the field after knocking off FSU last Friday night. HC Tony Elliott has to regroup quickly for the trip to Louisville where the Cardinals are fresh off a road win at Pittsburgh. Winner of this one is in a good position in the ACC race. Louisville QB Miller Moss “Man” can light it up and is due a big game. Staying at home for this one. Cardinals 34 But we beat FSU 30
11 Texas Tech Red Raiders vs Houston Cougars 6pm
Ring My Bell….. ( Ok ZT, that is a 1979 song by Anita Ward and have a feeling you also owned a Leasure Suit at that time )….The Bell Ringers from Lubbock got plenty to get excited about as they are 4-0 and a win this week keeps them in play in the competitive Big 12. Cougars are quietly 4-0 but this will be their biggest test of 2025. ZT likes to hunt and notes most animals scared of loud noises and most humans are scared of the Texas Tech Bell Ringers for obvious reasons. Red Raiders 31 Mrs. Robinsons of Texas 24
3 Miami Hurricanes vs 18 Florida State Seminoles 630pm
Well….. Gameday would have been in Tallahassee but the Osceola is still cleaning up the soiled sheets left in Charlottesville Motel 6. Hurricanes not really pressured since the opener vs ND and enjoyed an open week to prep for this one. Seminoles need a A+ game from QB Castellano and his OC Malzahnno ( not a type o). Hurricanes line on both sides are tougher than Jelly Roll’s proctologist. Hurricanes 28 Order more Depends. 24
Mississippi St Bulldogs vs 6 Texas A & M Aggies 630pm
ZT has had the misfortune of hearing Jimbo Fisher 2 times this week on SiriusXM….quickly turned it to Channel 35 to listen to Napalm Beach and Gas Huffer on the Grunge Channel to relax. ZT can only wish Fisher and Gary Danielson would go drive a car like Thelma and Louise…. ( Breathe ZT, Breathe!! ). Bulldogs had a chance to take out the Vols in Starkville but HC Jeff Lebby’s squad just couldn’t finish… The reward? A trip to a night game at College Station. Too Much too soon. Aggies 35 Droolius Ceasars 21
ZT is out and planning to attend the Vandy-Bama game..because it is the top ranked game of the week…..yes, the world is changing!!
DAD JOKE OF THE WEEK with a Bonus Joke …In honor of the recent events at Arkansas
What do you get when you put 12 Arkansas Cheerleaders in the same room? A FULL SET OF TEETH
Why do Arkansas Alumni put their college diplomas on their dashboard? So they can park in handicap spots..
Enjoy the weekend and if you get bored, watch some MLB playoffs!!
Pigskin Prognostications by the Piedmont Padre and Zimmern's Twin 