Tag: nil

Big Week for sure! First CFP Rankings are posted, Undefeated teams drops from 8 to 5, and something else….Oh yea, another nasty election but THANK YOU Mid American Conference for scheduling 2 games on Tuesday evening so we could at least watch C -grade announcers vs. talking political heads. It was better!!

Prognostication Accountability Padre 54 – 31 ZT 51 – 29

Padre still in the lead with more W’s and ZT ever so slightly ahead in win% ( which will not get one in the CFP or the Pigskin Prognostications Leader Board ZT….quit running numbers, you are behind!! )

Padre was distracted by multiple reports related to the UF Athletics program. He noted he will be prognosticating although he is currently wearing sackcloth & ashes while sitting outside Spurriers restaurant in Gainesville.

815am CDT Update: Padre is back in the house!! After much meditation on Week 11, here we go…

Florida vs Texas: (100% real family PF Chang’s dinner conversation from last night….)
Son: “Hey, Dad. Can I have your fortune cookie?”
Me: “Sure.”
Son: “Oh look, it says my future will have prosperity (we explain to him what that means). It also says I will succeed at following my dreams. This cookie definitely should have gone to me and not you.”
Me: “Why?”
Son: “Because you’re easily over 40. You no longer have dreams.”
Me: “That hurts.”
Son: “I’m not trying to be mean. It’s true. You’re old now. Your dreams are over.”
Me: “I am so thankful for the support of my family.”

I share this 100% true story (no sarcasm, this really happened) not for therapy reasons—although I need it after that existential crisis conversation triggered by my son. No, I share it because after this week’s news about Napier keeping his job, which was then followed by terrible allegations against our basketball coach the very next day, I think my son may have summed up my feelings on Florida football and basketball. My sports dreams have turned to nightmares, and this week Freddy Kruger is dressed in a burnt orange hat and Longhorn sweater. We will fight hard, but we will not make it off Elm Street. Texas cuts up an already beat up Gator squad by a score of 45-10.

Georgia vs Ole Miss: As if Longhorn Freddy Krueger didn’t torture me enough this week in Austin, before he delivers the final blow he keeps me alive to see Carson Beck lead a late game winning drive for the Dawgs. And paraphrase what Harry said to Lloyd in the cinematic classic Dumb and Dumber, Georgia fans look at their leader and say, “Just when I think you can’t drive me any crazier, you go and do something like this….and totally redeem yourself!” Georgia squeaks by 27-26.

Clemson vs Va Tech: As an SEC guy in an age of conference expansion, these are the two teams I would have found acceptable to join the conference. Their fanbases, stadiums, traditions, etc., all match the SEC. But they aren’t in the SEC. Therefore, my snobbery requires me to care as much about this game as I do Saturday morning European Soccer on the USA channel (or whatever channel it is on). In a game I will probably never watch, Clemson also squeaks by the same score of Georgia and Ole Miss, 27-26.

Army vs N Texas: This may seem like an odd game to pick, but as divided as we are as a nation we need something to rally around. Go Black Knights! I say Army stays unbeaten. Army by a score of 33-26.

Colorado vs Texas Tech: Coach Prime has his Buffs playing well — but I have a hunch the Red Raiders will be motivated. I am going to say that the most overlooked football program in Texas (outside Rice) takes down the most over-looked-at team in in the country. The Red Raiders in a classic, 31-30.

Alabama vs LSU: “I reckon dem boys down in Louisiana ain’t too fond of dem fellas from Tuscaloosa. But I don’t figure the boys from Tuscaloosa give a hoot.” That is what came out when I put the following into an AI Cajun translator: “I think those boys down in Louisiana really do not like those boys from Tuscaloosa. I do not think the boys from Tuscaloosa care.” The Tide, up four late, go for it on 4th and a yard around mid-field. They convert. Bama by inches on the Bayou by a score of 34-30. Good ole’ Kalen is safe for a week. Maybe. Meanwhile, all of those Bama friends preaching patience to me over the years are ready to burn down the program in one season after Saban retires. Funny how that works when you aren’t winning like you expect to win. 😉😏

Oklahoma vs Missouri: Speaking of teams who shouldn’t be in the SEC….that’s all I got….and all I need. Mizzou hits a late FG to win 24-23. And in my SEC arrogance, I probably will not watch this game either. True SEC fans are welcome to come over to my house and eat some BBQ pork with a plastic fork — as we look down on these “brisket” teams. 🐖

South Carolina vs Vandy: Beamer is riding high. His teams finally looks like they have turned that corner! Which means I’ll take Vandy with another 2024 upset! The Commodores eat chicken for dinner, 26-20.

BYU vs Utah: The best rivalry name of all rivalry names: “The Holy War”. When BYU would win in the past, I would always try to justify it by saying they must have older guys on their roster because of the missionary work they have to do (which is a rumor I have always been told, but I actually have no proof if it is true or not). However, even if true, that means nothing in the age of the transfer portal and yearly exemptions. Heck (using this H word instead of the other H word out respect of the rivalry name….and that I am a pastor), Utah’s Cam Rising is 37 years old (give or take a few years). So how does BYU do it? How do they win? I have no idea. Jim McMahon? Who knows? But I do think Utah ruins the Cougars’ run tonight. I’ll be in bed though — as the game starts at around 1:30am Eastern. Utah in the upset, 23-17.

Rough week to be a Gator fan. Oh, who am I kidding. It’s been a rough decade plus to be a Gator fan. We are allergic to winning and cannot have nice things. I sometimes wish I was allergic to watching them play, as I would probably have much happier Saturdays. Instead, I will sit in front of the TV and take it because I love them and will be loyal to them until the end. Plus, I spent too much money on that nice big HD TV to use it for Downtown Abbey or MASH reruns.

Sad Gator out…..

ZT excited to not be traveling and finished off the Halloween Candy which was not distributed last week ( happens to be a sack of mini Baby Ruth and 100 Grand bars ).

ZT noted it has been almost 4 days since he has seen something totally outlandish that claimed “a source said” coupled with “it was on website “XYZ” so it must be true!” Felt it was his duty to lead each prognostication with something similar to see if gains traction ( don’t flatter your journalistic power ZT )…..

Florida Gators vs #5 Texas Longhorns 11am

Aaron Rodgers to retire, spend 2 weeks in the darkest part of the Florida Caverns in Marianna Florida and will be the New UF Head Coach for 2026 since they are keeping Sunbelt Billy 1 more year. Gators had part of their tail cut off & fried in JAX after playing the Dawgs as tough as anyone. Good news? QB DJ Lagway injury is not as bad as first thought but still won’t be 100%. Can’t count on the Gator defense to keep them in this one even with the Texas turnover problem ( 2 in 6 of last 7 games ) Longhorns 31 TX State Fair Gator Bites 14

#2 Georgia Bulldawgs vs #12 Ole Miss Rebels 230pm

Kiffin to take off a season and be on “The Bachelor” and Saban will be his life coach for the series. Dawgs have 2 “danger games” left on their schedule and this is one of them. Fun part of the 12-team CFP? 2 loss teams can still be in it in November! Rebels have the D-Line to mess with Dawgs QB Carson Beck (17 TDs but 11 INTs ) and the Ole Miss WR Corps with QB Jackson “Flaming Hot” Dart (826 yds and 7 TDs in last 2 games) Is this that week? ESPN Predictor has Ole Miss with the edge… ZT says Dawgs find a way Dawgs 30 Rebel Yell 27

#17 Clemson Tigers vs Virginia Tech Hokies 230pm

Dabo going to play Bobby Bouche in “WATERBOY 2 – The Portal is the Devil”…. Clemson team will be wearing depends under their uniform after that “show” last week vs. Louisville at home!!! They are on the outside of the CFP but a shot if the run the table. Hokies dealing with injuries to QB Drones ( like for my DB to be named Drones but..) and RB “I had beans and been” Tuten that lead to a loss to the Orangemen last week. Just think Tigers QB Klubnik and gang get it together for a road W. Tigers 31 Nervous November Turkeys 24

#19 Army Black Knights vs North Texas Mean Green 230pm

Never spread a rumor about the Army…Period. They will find you and then you will not be found……. 8-0 Black Knights travel to Denton TX and currently have the longest win streak at 12!! Yes, ARMY!! The Mean Green needs a W to get bowl eligible. Do you check the stats? If so, you know UNTis ranked #3 in total offense while Army is ranked # 5 in total defense. One cause for concern is Army QB Bryson “much faster and slimmer than John” Daily led the nation in rushing TDs (19) but missed last week vs a grounded Air Force squad and it showed. Mean Green QB Chandler “Bing” Morris ( really ZT? A dead actor’s character as a reference? ) averages 359 ypg in the air and #2 in passing TDs with 29. ZT LOVES Army and what they are doing but something about this game…..Upset Special Mean Green 31 Sir Camo-Nots 28

#24 Colorado Buffaloes vs Texas Tech Red Raiders 300pm

Coach Prime going to Dallas Cowboys as Head Coach and AFLAC Duck will be new Mascot until they “get well”. Red Raiders got a solid road W over previously undefeated Iowa State last week and get a week off after this one. Buffaloes coming off a Bye have an interesting path as TT is the only team with a winning record left on their schedule. TT HC Joey “not Jerry” McGuire has this team on the right path but only because they have been able to outscore opponents. It will be the Sanders/Hunter show vs. TT RB Tahj “Mahal” Brooks and QB Morton who only has 5 INTs all year so yes, he takes care of the ball. With Coach Prime going to the Cowboys, UPSET SPECIAL Red Raiders 38 Bison Burgers 35

#28 South Carolina Gamecocks vs #25 Vanderbilt Commodores 315pm

Vandy Business School opening a campus in West Palm Beach FL to focus on Business and AI. A secret memo notes this is a shadow operation for South Florida football recruiting and offshore NIL funding so every football player gets a music recording contract or a spot on the new show “Vandy’s got Talent”. PAVIA, PAVIA, PAVIA…..leading the Commodores in spirit as well as passing and rushing! All South Carolina did was Baby Beamer Ball Texas A & M last week and needs 1 more W to be Bowl Eligible. Expect Gamecocks to run, which keeps Pavia on the sidelines, and use their stout pass rush to keep Pavia in check. Sounds easy but it ain’t! Upset Special Vandy 24 Boneless Chicken 23

#11 Bama vs #13 LSU Tigahs 630pm

Old video surfaces where Brian Kelly fooled the panel on the game show “To Tell the Truth” indicating he was an honest football coach but was actually a Maytag Repair Man. When asked about it he says “ wasn’t me but a guy that looks like me”.
Tide and Tigahs are in a CFP elimination game. Tigahs counting on a big game from QB Nussmeier just like Bama will be on QB Milroe. Who will make it happen? Bama losses came when they didn’t/couldn’t run the ball. There will be more “mood swings” in this game than in a Jr. High school girls locker room with the lead changes. Hard to beat the Tigahs in Baton Rouge at night.. Upset Special Tigahs 31 Ebb Tide 30 ( but hopefully headed to Snoop Dog Bowl!! )

Oklahoma Sooners vs #22 Missouri Tigers 645pm

Former OU QB Caleb Williams opening a Nail Salon franchise on the OU campus called “Giving Norman the Finger”. Sooners trying to get bowl eligible while Tigers got an outside chance to sneak into the CFP if they run the table. Mizzou needs QB Brady Cook to stay well enough to play 4 quarters and they must run the ball. IF QB Drew “ride the” Pyne is the starter, put on a pot of coffee. Sooners will try to run the ball. Key word is try…. Pure Home Team Play Tigers 24 Laters 21

#9 BYU Cougars vs Utah Utes 915pm

UTAH offering each player 3 girlfriends in NIL for 2025 to counter BYU NIL offering 2 & a new Huffy Bike in 2024. No sense in beating around the bush….without QB Cam Rising, Utes just are not competitive. UTES HC Kyle Whittingham even opened up the QB competition….never good, almost like having intramural tryouts for a kicker mid season…. Cougars (not the ones in the NIL) win The Holy War in Salt Lake City. Cougars 31 Uteless without Cam 13

ZT out!!!!