Tag: #Saturday

Undefeated team list includes Duke, Indiana, Kansas, Kentucky, Maryland, and North Carolina. Had to check the website to make sure we were still talking about College Football although a few teams are already looking forward to Hoops season. A total of 31 teams remain undefeated but that will change before the clock strikes midnight on Saturday!

Also, the coaching hot seat seems to start earlier each year and appears they have added an instant “ejector button” on it as well. The latest was Herm Edwards at Az State. Who’s Next? Not going there on this post but keep watching.

ZT been on the road from South Florida to the Nation’s Capital. Yep, all work and not much time for sports but was diligent taking his 50% off brain supplements so ready to prognosticate!!

#5 Clemson Tigers @ #21 Wake Forest Demon Deacons 11am cdt

Pair of unbeatens in the ACC to kickoff the day! Clemson has won 13 in a row in this series but…this is 2022. Dabo’s dudes looked a little better last week against La Tech but still not dominating. QB D. Ukulele ( ZT tired of trying to use so many vowels when you only get paid for consonants so shortening a name no one can pronounce anyway……. Wheel of Fortune reference by ZT?? What the…. ) was better and Tigers had to be fired up to see RB Will “slippery” Shipley have a big game. Was also fun to see Dabo run a 4.8 40 coming out of the tunnel but remember he was a WR ( Ok, Wide Blocker ) under Stallings at Bama. Wake pulled off a W vs. Liberty but also have wins over Vandy and VMI. QB Sam Hartman is solid and can lead this squad to a W at home. ZT favorite player in this one? WF backup TE Jaeger Bull…..hear his parents also had Fireball that same night but could not figure out how to tie that into his legal name. Bottom Line…Tigers too much for the practitioners of black magic. Tigers 27 Demon Deacons 24

Missouri Tigers @ Auburn Tigers 11am cdt

The Hot Seat is…well, HOT! Tough one and basically the Opelika Railroad has derailed and hard to see it getting back on the tracks. Decent running attack but the defeat by Penn State was deflating at best. Worse home loss all the way back to when the Chinese were still making Buzz Lightyear Jetpacks. ZT says they can still rebound this week. Rumors of Finley injury floating around and word is RS FR QB Robby Ashford will be the starter. Mizzou HC Eli “I will” Drinkwitz “you after the game” is a good coach in a tough location. They are on a 4-game losing streak in this series and are inspired to steal a road win and break the streak. War Eagles not helped by QB Finley’s dad weighing in on play calling & coaching. None of this noise matters and Mizzou upset not happening as it appears the dumpster fire near Opelika is at least contained for now. K Carlson wins it late. War Tigers 27 Midwest Nice Tigers 24

Notre Dame Fighting Irish @ North Carolina Tar Heels 230pm cdt

ZT STILL loves ND HC Marcus Freeman and glad to see him get a W. Also glad to see Mack “dancing machine” Brown having fun and guiding those Tar Heels to a 3-0 start. Who really cares if UNC is unranked? QB Drake “shake n’ bake” Maye has 11 TDs and only 1 INT with over 900 yards. Nice support from RB Omarion “I like to stay at the” Hampton “Inn for the waffles” ( yep, ZT traveling too much and it is showing! ) has 5 TDs and just over 70 YPG rushing. UNC best competition was Appy State. ND got the W over the Cal Bears last week. Dancing Mack gets the 1st W over ND in 60 years! Upset Special Tar Heels 35 Irish Cream 31

#20 Florida Gators @ #11 Tennessee Volunteers 230pm cdt

For the Gators, QB AR-15 playing more like a 1-cock Daisy BB gun so far. Knoxville is not a good place to fix your issues. Vols are 3-0 but Pitt was able to move the ball and that alone is enough to give UF HC Billy “you need to be a hero” Napier some confidence they can move the ball….WITH the right game plan. That plan has to be getting their playmakers out in the open field. Vols HC Josh Heupel has SURELY ( maybe not and stop calling him Shirley — ZT with a WEAK Airplane the Movie reference ) noted the Gator defense is vulnerable after the USF Bulls exposed them like Kim Kardashian at a Spanks store. Vols QB Hendon “I love the End Zone” Hooker has yet to throw an INT and, although against lessor competition, has been decent running the ball. Mountain Oyster Boys 31 Gator Bites 21

#15 Oregon Ducks @ Washington State Cougars 3pm CDT

Ducks have recovered nicely since that near fatal Bulldog attack in Week 1. Now they travel to Pullman for a date with the undefeated WSU Cougars. Never an easy place to play. Cougars HC Jake “the snake” Dickert had them ready and prevented a let down in Week 3 by pounding winless Colora”duh” State. (That team needs to be allowed by the NCAA to eat gummies!!!). QB Cameron Ward ( transfer from The Incarnate Word ) is solid but must avoid the INT ( 2 vs. Wiscy ) if WSU is to have a chance for an upset. The ZT Word says he will throw some picks and the Ducks will continue to fly through the Punk-12. Ducks 34 Cougars 28

Vandy @ #2 Bama 630pm cdt

Commodores are professed to be a “force to be reckoned with” by HC Clark “Griswold” Lea. ZT still likes his moxie. ZT also worked the door at a college bar and helped carry many lightweights with moxie to a medically equipped vehicle but still liked their fighting spirit. (Did ZT just toss in a Modelo Beer reference? ). Wounded elephants are very dangerous but do note Bama travels to ARK next week and then A & M at home. They better not overlook Vandy or they will be missing a tusk. Redneck Pachyderms 48 Tug Boat Captains 10

#10 Arkansas Razorbacks @ #23 Texas A & M Aggies 6pm cdt

Bud Man vs. Dud Man in THE Man’s Stadium! ( yes, Jerry World). ZT likes Jimbo Fisher about the same as 3 week old egg salad. Aggies appear to have settled on QB Max “bikini wax” Johnson as the starter but offense is far from clean with plenty of stubble. Air attack will have some opportunity against a Hog Defense more vulnerable to the pass in the secondary but with a pretty good pass rush. Aggie Defense continues to improve so this test vs. a Hog stampede will be the difference maker. Hogs like rotting food so… Pork Sausage 24 Rotting Egg Salad Coach 21

Kansas State Wildcats @ #6 Oklahoma Sooners 7pm cdt

K State dropped an egg ( what is it with ZT and eggs this week? ) last week against the Green Wave of Tulane…..like to think they were looking ahead to a date with Boomer Schooner in Norman this week. Home team has won in the last 4 matchups and ZT doesn’t see it any different this year. Sooner QB Dillon “I ain’t that kind of angel” Gabriel has been efficient but the Purple Power Cats will be the best defense he has faced in 2022. On the other side, KSU QB “YO” Adrian Martinez has not played up to his hype after his transfer from Nebraska. Didn’t help Scott Frost there either. Sooners 28 Wildcats 20

ZT is done and plans to celebrate Fish Amnesty Day by not eating any of them today…..but wait till Sunday!!!!

Padre is in an Appalachian Mountain Cave and no word if he will surface until after his Gators play the Vols. Stay tuned!!!

831 AM NEWS FLASH: Padre has come out of the cave for prognostication proclamation so here we go!!

Long Week in the cave! I don’t have my usual ATTEMPT at humor for each game. My humor is kind of like Florida when we attempt a pass – the joke that doesn’t always land well. I will say this, Florida has beaten Tennessee 16/17 years. And we stunk most of those years!! Today?? I fear a Rocky Top avalanche of revenge is coming. I am going to Clemson @ Wake Forest for the early game, where Wake is favored to stay closer to Clemson than Florida is to Tennessee. Geez. Next you’re gonna tell me that Georgia won a national title in football and is expected to win more. Oh wait. I guess Bob Dylan was right, ” the times they are a changin.” So because of my long week, and my expectation of what is to come in Knoxville, I will be very pithy below. Pray that I can remember Florida is rebuilding and that it’s ok. Because my poor dog doesn’t want to hear my yelling at the TV.

Baylor 23 Iowa St. 20

Bears are too heavy/powerful for Cyclones. Bears Close!

Tennessee 44 Florida 16

Remember that scene from the new Batman where his is asked who he is and he brutally beats up the guy and says ” vengeance” ? That is what happens in Knoxville today.

Clemson 37 Wake Forest 16

Going to this game today. Hoping for an upset or at least a fun game, but expecting a lot of sacks!

Oregon 38 Wazzu 20

Nike money > Cool Wazzu logo

Arkansas 24 Texas A & M 23

There is a Walmart right next to Jerry’s World, where this game will be played. Arkansas sees that Walmart and it reminds them of home. They gut out a win to set up a big time game with Bama next week.

Ohio State 41 Wisconsin 10

Ohio State’s brutal Big 10 slate begins…. It’s a hard-knock life for those Buckeyes

Big Upset of the Week

Oregon State 38 USC 34

After this surprising upset, the entire city of LA is……just fine. They are fine. It’s LA. Football is on par with fat free yogurt there.

Bigger Upset of the Week

Stanford 30 Washington 26

Emmitt Smith’s kid is running wild at Stanford. The brainiacs take down the Huskies.

Biggest Upset of the Week

Texas Tech 29 Texas 17

I am still not sure what is a Red Raider, but on Saturday, it’s a W!

Once again, pray for this Pastor. Watching my Gators get steamrolled will test my soul!!!